Today feels so strange to me. I spent the morning with the boys just playing and laughing with them. It's weird because they are going to my mom's this evening, and early tomorrow morning I will go to the hospital to have their little brother as planned. I never made it all the way to the end with Austin or Braeden, so this ability to plan and pack and do the laundry feels too easy.
Don't get me wrong, it's not physically easy anymore. Along with my belly being as huge as it can possibly get, the baby resting on my bladder, and painful but not regular contractions, I have now developed some sort of really itchy rash on my hands and ankles. I had the same rash with the boys, but it was just on my belly. The hands is a horrible place to have a rash.
So obviously I am physically ready for this little one. I can't wait to meet him. But along with that I have the anxiety of being away from my boys while I am in the hospital. I have the anxiety of how difficult it will be to be outnumbered by kids now in our house. I have the anxiety of what the boys will think of having a new brother and a mom who really can't do much as I recover from surgery. Today just feels weird.....that's all. I am thrilled and excited, but nervous and anxious. Talk about butterflies in the belly!
Don't get me wrong, it's not physically easy anymore. Along with my belly being as huge as it can possibly get, the baby resting on my bladder, and painful but not regular contractions, I have now developed some sort of really itchy rash on my hands and ankles. I had the same rash with the boys, but it was just on my belly. The hands is a horrible place to have a rash.
So obviously I am physically ready for this little one. I can't wait to meet him. But along with that I have the anxiety of being away from my boys while I am in the hospital. I have the anxiety of how difficult it will be to be outnumbered by kids now in our house. I have the anxiety of what the boys will think of having a new brother and a mom who really can't do much as I recover from surgery. Today just feels weird.....that's all. I am thrilled and excited, but nervous and anxious. Talk about butterflies in the belly!
